Life Of A Free Agent

One thing for certain in the NFL is NOTHING is for certain! 

We knew that though, and we have been so blessed to be with ONE team for the past 3 1/2 years.

As a un-drafted free agent, odds are, you won't ever make a roster. Let alone last one season. 

Ray has overcome all the odds stacked against him and we've been extremely blessed. 

Not only has he overcome those statistical odds of being a free agent,  our first year here, he got into a bad car accident, totaled our car and was out for 2 weeks with a bad concussion and banged up.

 3 days after he came back to work, he broke his finger at a game and had to have surgery and had 7 screws put into his finger and was out for another two weeks. 

Last year, 3 days into camp, his toenails get stepped on all the time, well, they were starting to swell up and were full of blood and the team trainers stuck needles down inside to drain them, well, they both got infected and he couldn't walk because of the infection and swelling and was out for 10 days. Then in October last year, he got really sick and had an upper intestinal bleeding and 3 bleeding ulcers. He had lost so much blood and was not doing very well. He had 4 blood transfusions and was in ICU for a week. Scary stuff.. then THIS year, the bleeding started again. Thankfully he caught that really early and no blood transfusions were needed, but he was out of work for five days and in ICU for three of those days and has slowly recovered from that. He was back grinding in the humidity and sun with a low blood count, but that's what he had to do. All this was happening while I was in Utah for my Grandma's funeral. :( Talk about needing to be in two places at once!! 

Now, every time something happened, he was cut from the team and then brought back. We knew they were going to bring him back, and we understood why they had to cut him for being out, because they needed another body there to replace him. 

On August 31, he got a phone call from the Dolphin's that they were releasing him. Now, that sucked because we knew they weren't going to be bringing him back this time.  All of his Practice Squad eligibility had been used because he now had over 2 credited NFL seasons.
It was either 53 man or nothing.
 Unfortunately, it was the latter of the two.
Sad, sad day for us.
We cried.
A lot.
 A lot more than I have ever expected.
I think I was just so sad that our journey in South Florida was now over. We love South Florida and the team. We love our family and friends down here. I don't think we could've went to a better place. What are the chances that the only team where I have a cousin who plays, Ray get's signed there? We made our roots and finally got comfortable and settled in after three years and I think the harsh reality was, he was unemployed now. We were hoping for a call from one of the thirty-one other teams out there.
A few teams were interested, but nothing concrete.
Crazy thing, I knew we weren't the only families going through this either.
Seven HUNDRED men were cut the same day as Ray around the NFL. That meant, seven hundred dreams were crushed. Seven hundred men were waiting for ONE phone call to change everything.

Of course, I went into 'survival' mode. Plan B was to just get back to Utah, get settled into our home and then if he got a call from another team he would just go. It's really hard to have any kind of stability when you're at the bottom of the roster. I think a lot of people have the inclination that we all live this glamourous 'Tom Brady' life.  I called our landlord, and gave them our 30 day notice. At least we would have until the end of September to figure things out. To keep my mind off things, I started packing up stuff. As I looked around at everything, I would just start crying. It was overwhelming to think I had to box up our home and some how get it all to Utah with 2 cars, not even knowing if Ray was going to be around to help! To be honest, I hoped he wasn't. I wanted him gone as soon as possible, because that meant he had a job again. 

Tuesday September 4th, I got up with the twins and Ray was already awake. He said he had some missed calls from the Dolphin's. He had a glimmer of hope in his eyes. He just grinned. It was nice to see that grin, after seeing him so down in the dumps for the past 5 days. I think that was the hardest part of all of this, was to see HIM so upset. Actually, I KNOW that was the hardest part. Because I know how hard he works. I know how hard he has worked to get to this level. I know the sacrifices made to live this dream. I know how much he LOVES this job and how he has prepared to do this job since he was eight years old. Seriously, how many people start preparing for a job at the age of eight??

 He said something to me after he was released and I just broke down. I tried not to cry in front of him and be strong and positive, but he said
"Do you know how it feels to be told your best isn't good enough?" 

Now I know why he doesn't want our boys to play football. It's  a tough industry.  A cut throat industry and I feel that a lot of the time, fans and outsiders get so wrapped up in the game of it all, that they forget these guys are human beings. Human beings with dreams, and families and feelings!!! 

Just seeing that grin made everything okay!

His phone rang again, it was the Dolphin's calling back and asked him to come in that they were signing him back to the 53 man roster. The saying 'One man's misfortune, is another man's fortune' lies true with the NFL. Artis Hicks was injured and put on the Injured Reserved list and was out for the season. Ray was now taking his place. You're expendable in this business, and there are a hundred guys waiting to take your job, and only 224 men in the world who get to do it!

 He was  beyond elated. He never wanted to leave here. He truly loves the organization and his coaches and the guys. I know he is so happy to be back into his routine! I think the thought of starting all over somewhere else was what was unsettling. I am so relieved we don't have to make that trek across the country either. Not now anyway. Such a crazy life. Especially for a Type A personality like myself. All I can say is that I am very proud. Proud of Ray's perseverance, and hard work and sacrifices. No wonder the poor guy has ulcers!! I think I developed one this past week. Sometimes when he comes home all banged up and walking like he's an eighty year old man, I tell him he doesn't need to play anymore. He just shakes his head at me.  He plays because he loves the game. He plays because he just can't let go of that yet. Something only a true athlete can understand.  I am proud of the example he sets for our boys to never give up on your dreams, even when someone tells you your best isn't good enough. So, for now.. we are back with the Dolphin's!!

No matter what though, we are always TEAM FEINGA!!!